Friday, March 25, 2011
The stress of life has gotten to me lately.. Normally I am very good at separating myself from all of the craziness.. but lately.. not so much..
My emotions have gotten the better of me and I have been rather sad ... I don't like being sad.. Kris and the kids have been wonderful.. they do their best to cheer me up.. and make me feel better.. but I am not even sure if they understand what is going on...
I have had to make some very hard decisions.. mostly for my own well being.. Not many things last forever... so in order to rid myself of stupid girl emotions I did what I felt I needed to do..
Sometimes things in life change and there is nothing that you can do to go back to the way it was.. and that is ok.. we all have to change and grow ... we get better as we get older.. we learn more.. we grow more..
I will continue to grow and change, hopefully for the better.. I am determined to be a better person tomorrow than I am today.. Change is never easy.. but it is the purpose of life.. to experience change is to experience new things.. to grow.. to learn.. and I want to always learn..
I want to know more tomorrow than I know today.. I want to be a good influence on those around me. .. I want to leave behind sorrow and bath in the sunshine of happiness.. My family brings me so much happiness ... all of the sorrow I have felt lately has come from relationships outside of my family.. I will repair the ones that I can.. and move on from the ones that I cannot..
I will not let myself dwell on sadness because that is what I used to do.. who I used to be.. but it is not who I am now.. so when sadness starts to invade my life then it is time for more growth.. time to study myself and see where it comes from.. time to do what needs to be done to find the right road..
Find the happiness in your life.. do not let anything external affect how you feel about yourself.. I have done that too often in my life.. Rejection is a part of life we all must deal with .. some of us take it harder than others.. I know I tend to take it pretty hard because of my past...but I am working on it.. working on myself.. working on fixing it.. still have a long way to go.. but I will get there..